Lyrics: Dustin Pfaff
Music: Dustin Pfaff
I'm the beast in the woods,
The creature that leaves you to bleed in the bush.
And I bathe in the beams of the moon; beneath it, you see me.
Break through the cage of the human that keeps me!
Step out your castle so that I can put you back in your coffin!
I'm on the trail for a battle; it's not a shadow I'm boxing!
You're just a zombie; a bag of bones that I'll chomp through!
Ask Frank's Monster; I got a nose for rot, too!
You showed your contract, conned Thomas to sign it.
So desperate to cop his wife, your cock blocked the fine print!
Brought your cobwebs and a plague to steal his bride with!
You're never gonna turn her on; stick to the light switch!
I'm tired of your talk... Unleash the beast inside you.
I hear you've got the bark... now let me bite you.
I'll make you my servant, one tragic night's dream.
Sign-a right here and contract my disease!
You're poached; I'll grab your scruff with firm hold
Then wear this wolf when I take your fur coat!
When your dame's in bed alone, you're a creep who just stares!
But check your telescope; see me creep up her stairs!
She got sick of this bitch-man, asked for some action!
I've come to deliver; I'm the whole package!
Run a tight ship, sailing to your side-chick.
I can slip inside her, 'cause I'm on her invite list!
Fill her with excitement, soar into the night's mist!
'Fore you bat an eyelid, she'll turn into a flight risk!
If you're busy in the bed, you got a death wish.
Sink into a shoulder, and you're toast before breakfast!
I don't have to wait at the doorstep.
They run when I howl at the moon... or in this case, your forehead!
You always have a mob takin' shots at 'ya.
You're a wolf in a town playing Mafia!
But I'll put you down like they never could.
One bite, and you'll bleed through your neck of the woods!
These canines are 'bout to make a snack of you,
Something that your snaggletooth couldn't hold a candle to!
Better check your attitude! You're like a bowl of water, way I'm lappin' you,
'Cause who on Earth would rather choose the Babadook in pantaloons?!
You inhabit their minds, but you never learn!
You bit off Dracula's style, and it left you burned!
You want some blood spilled? Write down on your intertitle cards:
"I'm 'bout to rip your eyes apart"; now it's a snuff film!
With the vampires left in my wake,
I passed down the torch that would scare you away!
You were just daddy's mistake,
So your old man made you Old Yeller with a smack of your cane!
Maybe I'll make you my pet; lay upon my lap.
Sit, stay, play dead; now do the Monster Mash!
I will live forever after your pulse fails!
Moral of the story: silver always ends the wolf's tale.
With that, the creatures stopped the fight
And made their way into the night.
Now, none can keep these beasts at bay
As they look out for easy prey!
So watch your back when it gets late
Or suffer a most gruesome fate.
Be quiet, and you'll hear them say,
"The next rap battle's on the way."