Lyrics: Joan Cross/Anne Wood/Gottlieb Stephanie/Hugh Mills
Music: Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
OSMIN: Gentleness! Kindness! Who the devil put all that stuff into your head?
(aside) She’ll drive me crazy!
(to Blonda) Look here, Blonda – I order you to love me.
BLONDA: I don’t suppose I should love you, if you were the last male on the face of the earth.
What you can’t you get into your head is that I am English. And in England women are treated with profound respect.
They are never ordered to do anything. They are asked what they would like to do. That is what happens in England.
OSMIN: Yes. And I believe the climate also leaves much to be desired.
(amorously) Oh, Blonda – (He puts his arm round her.)
BLONDA: Hands off, or I’ll hit you!
OSMIN: I’ll wager you don’t talk to Pedrillo like that. I’ve got an eye on you two. Though what you see in him I can’t imagine.
BLONDA: What I see in Pedrillo is a handsome, adorable man. And what I see in you is a pompous old wind-bag.
OSMIN (furiously): I’ve had enough! Into the house! At once!
BLONDA: Certainly not, I will not go into the house! My mistress told me to meet her here.
And incidentally don’t forget that the Pasha will do anything for her.
One word from her – that’s all it needs to get you fifty lashes!
OSMIN: She’s a devil! (Osmin goes towards his door in a fury but turns back.)