All of my life I never knew
I'd be the one that I need to
Pick up the pieces shattered inside of me
Ain't no apology setting me free
I need a reason I need a break
I need to find a little bit of faith
'Cause if I don't I'mma drown in my misery
All of my victory's going to waste
I've been complacent I've been depressed
Dealing with demons I'd rather neglect
All of the bragging inside of my music
I found it was me I was trying to impress
Maybe I just need to step back
Maybe you're the empathy that I lack
Is a product of the construct that I built for myself
And necessity for my path
All of my wrath has never been quelled
Putting my vices over my health
Isolation never been no help
I'll overthink I hate myself
Hoping that wealth will make it better
Maybe I'll be this way forever
Maybe I need to feel the pressure push through
Gotta stand my ground till my demons all surrender
Oh I don't wanna let go
From this life I'm a lost soul
From the drama and the heartbreak
Still haunted by the mistakes
Oh they will never let me go
Let me go I find it hard being human now feeling alive
It ain't new to me
Been losing my face surrounded by hate
I only see god of the eulogy
Just gotta call them my dads got dementia well I gotta
Act like I'm fine
Watching the people I love start to wither away
Six hundred miles apart
It eats me inside knowing that I should be home
But I just keep on falling behind
This not the life that I envisioned
Depleted dismissive destructive
At twenty five man what happened to me
I used to be there for everybody
Now I'm not
Can't even answer my phone without being reminded
My homies are still popping off
And I became jealous and bitter and spiteful
Reclusive and pessimistic as could be
Heart became colder unable to feel any empathy
Less just directed at me
Deflected it won't take acceptance for anything
Shut off humanity just so to breathe
When hubis and pluto remind us to run defeat
It said I'd never fall victim to greed
But that's where I'm at
I need to let go
Of everything keeping me inside this hole
But if you want love and acceptance
For public perception
I promise you'll never be whole
Had to remember the reason
I started this off of the journey
We'll see where this goes
But I cannot let
All my heathens and demons keep holding me back
I'm taking control
Damn oh I don't wanna let go
From this life I'm a lost soul
From the drama
And the heartbreak still haunted by the mistakes
Oh they will never let me go let me go