Lyrics: Layne Stein/Anthony Wakim
Music: Layne Stein/Anthony Wakim
You know ,they named me Charming.
Not Charles, not Clifford, not Kent.
Just Charming, no last name.
Like I'm a perfume scent.
“Just find a girl,”my father said.
And then produce a heir.
Well, I have the girl. Well, had.
Where did Charming get me?
Nowhere
I entered a ball,and the whispers begin
He's dashing, so handsome, would you look at his grin?
I'm just supposed to smile and give the girl a twirl.
Forget my plans for a democracy.
Girls just see keys to the monarchy.
Does anyone ask what I think of the war?Nope.
Or taxes, or roads ,or literally anything more?
They want the handsome trophy man
And not the 5-year plan.
I tried to lead with good diplomacy.
All they want is pump and pageantry.
Then there‘s her,the girl who lost the shoe.
And disappears like every plot hole I see through.
I'm more than just Charming.
I‘m more than a smile
I'm more than the armpiece that a princess needs.
To walk her down the aisle
I balanced our economy and opened trade last year.
I cut the tariffs
But that's not what they all want to hear.
I'm just the guy to search the land.
With fragile footwear in his hand.
I'm more than just a charming prince for a girl.
A boy meets a girl but he finds out she's dead.
My job is to save her so the plot moves ahead.
I'm just the prince, a norm, no name.
Exist, but don’t complain.
Find the princess that you love but then you find out there's seven other men.
Wait, what?
A princess is cursed ,that’s the setup I guess.
A girl,a witch, a prince.
I mean, that's it more or less.
Just save the girl,that’s great.
No plans for healthcare,war or state.
No, you let the princess do the feeling.
Your job is just to do the kneeling.
And by the way,we picked you a bride.
Your future’s pre-agreed.
But now I'm starting to wonder.
Is this what I really need？
I'm more than just handsome.
I'm more than a prop.
I'm more than the guy in tights on horseback.
And whose name they all forgot.
I've smiled through hypocrisy to last me 10 careers.
And for God’s sake,no more royal balls.
They’re traps with chandeliers.
A kiss without consent is gross.
So I guess she’ll lay there comatose.
I'm more than just a charming prince for a girl.
We act the role and we wear the crown.
We lift them up, but they hold us down.
I could stop global warming but no one would care.
In a princess’s story
Is the prince even there
I'm more than just charming.
Do I get a plot? Probably not.
I'm just the face they frame.
Wait, what's his name?
I'm the hero they forgot.
So if you want the fairytale, go and buy the book.
But news for you,
The prince inside it only has one look.
Stand tall and smile. Don't offend.
That's where the royal training ends.
I‘m more than just a handsome, gallant, mindless, charming prince for a girl.