Lyrics: Lachlan Self
Music: Lachlan Self
Thank you! Thank You!
What lovely contestants we’ve got TODAY, Folks—!!!
I’m glad you could tune in!
Mr. (Ant) TENNA’S the ONE!! Your entertainment!
You’re the STAR of the show! You’re the next BIG TREND!!
FIVE minutes of fame? (can’t get it from an egg.)
My Marvelous Mystery Board’s all NIGHT!!
It’s a mystery to ever be bored ALRIGHT!!
I’m the gameshow host with the most and Mike!
Just say it with him folks!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
Kick back, relax. Switch off your mind
Sit too close, you’ll end up blind
Don’t touch that dial, don’t hit that light
Until we’re off the air—!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
Sensations of your screen!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
The show that makes you scream!
The Fun-O-Meter’s low! So we better keep it up folks!
Come and tune in to your favourite shows!
SIT-COMS!! RERUNS!! ROM-COMS!! BINGO!!
(Hey, we gotta keep up with the nursing homes.)
Coming straight from YOUR house! Behind your screen!
Ad-breaks all about YOUR late-night dream!
Live Streaming? Like TEARS?! Well I’d bet against that!
Hey, Mike! Do tell… WHO THE HECK IS CHAT?!!
It’s GROOVY, NEVER glooby! Every night at six!
It’s SINISTER AND SPOOKY! (Rated: Not for Kids)
Do you want a FREE CAR?! Do you wanna be RIPPED?!
Do you want a new HEART?! Do you wanna be HIT?!
See I know you so well, all the things you like!
All the TV dinners. All the TV fries!
So return next season for an EASY life!
Say it with me, Folks—!!!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
Kick back, Relax. Switch off your mind
Sit too close, you’ll end up blind
Don’t touch that dial, don’t hit that light
Until we’re off the air—!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
Tune in, invite your friends!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
The fun that never ends!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
Sensations of your screen!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
The show that makes you scream!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
The word on the street: Coming LIVE!! they say
viewership capsized… AND IT’S UP IN FLAMES!!
TEAR DOWN MY HOUSE!!
TEAR DOWN MY KIDS!!
Who doesn’t wanna sit around ec-STATIC grin?!
Hey MIKE! I’m back! PLAY THE VHS!!
If they don’t wanna wait, they can be my GUEST!!
In tonight’s forecast; rain’s gonna be next!!
Do you know where your children are? It’s 10 pm
Who killed the radio star and why?!
Was it me? or Mike?! or the E-mail guy?!
Is it still TV if it’s all online?
On-demand just doesn’t have the vibe of TV time!
Time to face the music when they look up to the stage
Cause each phosphor chants in unison, each row is interlaced
Know the camera’s always rolling so put on a happy face
It’s just standard definition but they’ll see if you’re afraid
So
Kick back, Relax. Switch off your mind
Sit too close, you’ll end up blind
Don’t touch that dial, don’t hit that light
Until we’re off the air—!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
Be witnessed through a lens!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
In stitches you’ll be left!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
Sensations of your screen!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
The show that makes you scream!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
Why should I CARE what the survey said?!
Blockbusters are IN with the TV sets!!
Who wants to be a “BIG SHOT” when you’re met
with the whole world shouting that you’re BURNED IN?!!
We’ll PLAY til’ you LIKE IT!! Again and AGAIN!!
Cause the game’s never OVER!! Not before I SAY!!
All the good stuff shouldn’t be thrown AWAY!!
You’ve a new best friend, and he’s all the CRAZE!!
Hey, you’ve got a CONTRACT!! Actors must ACT!!
You’re in PRIME TIME now! This is where it’s at!
I’m new! The Cathode Raytube! You’ll laugh!
You’ll cry!
oh time, it moves too fast…
If you think I’m outdated, that’s FINE!!
Oh HELL!! The rest of you can leave but NOT YOU MIKE!!
Not you!! NOT YOU!! Anyone but YOU!!
If you leave me too…
then I’ve got no one…
BUT this telly’s got a vision, it’ll be alright!!
If you’ll listen, we’ll relive it!! Make it like old times!!
So be kind! It's FINE!! I’m running all night!!
To the folks at home…
It’s TV time…
Kick back, Relax. Switch off your mind
Sit too close, you’ll end up blind
Don’t touch that dial, don’t hit that light
Until we’re off the air—!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
Inside I got a friend!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
The fun of play-pretend!
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
Sensations of your screen
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
The show that makes you scream
IT’S!! TV!! TIME!!
(Miss the antenna’s TV guide?)
(then switch to your favourite station)
(It’s Mr. (Ant) Tenna’s TV TIME)
(your feature presentation)