Music: Kenneth Fabian/Raphael Cortez
(Yo
You free right now?
Look man, I'm
I'm— I'm tired man
I'm sick of this shit)
7th of January
Count it like actuaries
Finding a reason to live
We never never wary
A time computer screens
And video games is how we bury
Ourselves to not remind ourselves
About the weight we carry
It was a little early
A few lost hours of sleep
But now I'm in a hurry
Got up to make a call
To set it straight
A lil' something on my plate
And after that
All I thought
There was nothing to worry
The clock be ticking some more
Do what we do, we on it
But when it reads 2 o'clock
Couldn't get what i wanted
Now the fear and pain be creepin' up
The air suddenly heatin' up
Only thing i'd do is drown
In sorrow if it's deep enough
A couple hours
Then I'm gettin ready
Empty handed but the burden feel
A little heavy, good Lord
My mind is all in a gut
I do a little chatter
Then I take a sip from a cup
Suddenly nothing matters
On and on, I wanna fly so far
Can't get out, but how
I try so hard
Take this off
Nd you would see my scars
No such deed would
Ever heal my heart
The 10th of February
We gettin' right back in
Vision a little blurry
Our words get mixed up in gin
Our words get mixed up
With what we say and what we feel
Don't know the difference between
Saving face and turning heel
I met a couple mother****ers
This is where I discover
How it's possible
That I am always just an other
Too many reasons keep me up at night
My own demons is all I fight
After a couple shots
Feel like I need another
Another night, the 4th of March
Feel like I need a lift
My situation gettin harsh
But I don't give a shit
Every moment going
By is a distraction
From my worries
And the possibilities
Of a delayed reaction
It's getting late
And all I wonder
"Will I be okay"
It ain't like I live
A couple dozen miles away
The morning after
Man I swear I think
I should be battered
But after a sip from that cup
Suddenly nothing mattered
On and on, I wanna fly so far
Can't get out, but how
Try so hard
Take this off
And you would see my scars
No such deed would
Ever heal my heart
(Mhmm
Mmh, got any more?)
I knew some buddies
We was happy
We was more than friends
But like they say I guess
The world just hates a happy end
One April night, I got a bottle
Shit got me feeling blue
How they gon' leave me
After all the shit
That we had been through
Shots with the homies
We talked about a homie
Said he ****in'
Just to realize that
All he ever did was bluffin'
Matter of time before
The sand had closed the door
Cause we ain't gonna look
At us the same anymore (word)
December 4th, somebody movin'
She gone and grovin'
But she don't know bout back
At home the shit that we'll be losin'
But it don't matter
After all the miles and chatter
After all the sleepless hours
She'll be provin'
With the way she boomin'
2:27 in the morning
I might as well be mourning
What I'm hearing got me ****ed
Up without any warning
At any moment it can really be the end
But I'd rather lose myself
In all than lose another friend
Yeah, I'd rather lose myself
To have a feeling that's elusive
I'd rather lose myself
Than have a family
That's abusive
I'd rather go be locked up
In a room that's full of snakes
Than look in the mirror
Because there's no one else to hate
The burden, the feeling
The hurting, the healing
All that in between
Living without knowing bout
What any of it really mean
I'll only live so long
Before my ashes go and scatter
Gimme some shots
I'll see if any
Of this really matters
(Hey man)
Do any of it really matter
(Just wanted to thank you again
For dealing with all my bullshit
I know you got a lot of bullshit
Going on in your life so
I really appreciate it
Look, I'm
I'm always here
For you too, aight?
Take care
Love ya man)