Music: Cyndi Lauper
LAUREN
Oh, no. Oh, don’t you dare. No, girl, girl, I’m warning you! No!
I think I’ve got crush. Ah! I can’t. I think I’m fallin’ for him.
Oh, no.
Why not?
Women have been making bad choices
Since the beginning of time.
Are you gonna be another one of mine? Ohhh
CHARLIE
Lauren? Lauren.
LAUREN
Argh!
CHARLIE
Ah, I was thinking keeping you on the production line is a waste of your talents.
I’d like you to work with me on the Milan show.
LAUREN
Oh, uh, you don’t owe me a job.
CHARLIE
No?
LAUREN
No.
CHARLIE
All this started with you having a fit.
LAUREN
Well, yeah, I had a fit, but you had an idea.
That’s why some of us get our names on factories and the rest on punch-cards.
CHARLIE
As someone whose name is on factory, I am asking if I may please place your name on one of my executive punch-cards?
Good? Good.
What? Have I got something stuck in my teeth?
LAUREN
Just funny how you can know someone all your life and not really know ’em at all. Ha ha ha.
CHARLIE
Well, I guess I’ll be seeing you later.
LAUREN
Sure thing, boss!
Used to think you were from outer space
Who’s that bright-eyed guy in your place?
You’re kind of cute
When you're not so shy.
Oh.
But I’ve been here before
Have I come back for more?
Another chapter in the history of wrong guys
You used to be so "eh"
A limp lackluster bore
But now you’re changing into
Someone I just can’t ignore.
Charlie, honestly
I’ve been hurt like this before
Is there really more to you
Than what I always thought?
How can you surprise me any more?
Oh. Oh. Oh.
He’s got a girlfriend, you nob!
Don’t want to be another star-crossed lover.
We all know how that ends.
I’m better off without him
We're better off as friends.
But I’ve been here before
Have I come back for more?
Another chapter in the history of wrong guys.
Yesterday no spark
No heart aching allure
But today I’m feeling
Something I just can’t ignore.
Charlie, honestly
I’ve been hurt like this before
Oh, oh, oh
The history of wrong guys:
Chapter one -- he’s a bum
Two -- he’s not into you
Three -- he’s a sleaze
Four -- loves the girl next door
Five -- loves the boy next door
Six -- don’t love you no more
-- makes you insecure
-- makes you so unsure
-- is so immature
-- loves his mother more
-- or...
... has a girlfriend named Nicola
CHARLIE
Ready to get to work?
LAUREN
Charlie, honestly
I’ve been hurt like this before
I can see there’s more to you
Than what I always thought
But I won’t be burned anymore
Oh, oh, oh
TRISH
Where you off to?
LAUREN
I been exec-utized.