(How much do I owe you?)
For all the years I gave away for free...
(How much do I owe you?)
For all the years I gave away for free...
I kept a list of everything I gave you
Not because I wanted it back, but to remind me I was real
My time, my trust, my body, my patience
You took them all like they were part of the deal
I never asked for receipts, I never kept the score
Until I realized you were keeping one of your own
You gave me just enough to keep me at the table
But never enough to make me feel like I was home
I gave you everything, you gave me almost
I showed up open, you showed up closed
I paid in tears, you paid in silence
I gave you love, you gave me violence
Tell me, was I ever worth the cost?
Or was I just a line in your loss?
I thought we were building something true
But I was just paying rent in a house that wasn't new
My friends say I should write it off as a lesson
But lessons don't leave bruises that take years to fade
I put your name on everything I trusted
And you put my name on every mistake you made
You told me I was priceless, but you never paid the price
You held me like a treasure, then left me on the ice
I gave you all my currency, emptied out my chest
And you spent it all on someone who loved you less
(What if I stopped paying?)
What if I closed the account and walked away?
What if I stopped giving you credit for the man you used to be?
What if the debt was never mine to pay?
(Oh...)
I've been bankrupt for years and I didn't even know
I gave you my heart, you gave me a loan
With interest I could never afford to own
And now I'm left with nothing but the ghost of what I loaned
I gave you everything, you gave me almost
I showed up open, you showed up closed
I paid in tears, you paid in silence
I gave you love, you gave me violence
Tell me, was I ever worth the cost?
Or was I just a line in your loss?
I thought we were building something true
But I was just paying rent in a house that wasn't new
But I was just paying rent in a house that wasn't new
(Paying rent...)
(In a house that wasn't new...)
Was I ever worth the cost?
(How much do I owe you?)
I
I gave you everything, you gave me almost