[Ted] Hey
[Phonic] What up?
[Flowny]
Yo, Phonic, Teddy… it’s Flow.
Word up in the North, they’re running low.
Low on spirit. Low on cash. Low on love.
2016 was kind of brutally rough. I’ve had enough.
You know I think 'bout now it’s time to suit up.
But this year our mark's a little harder. Maybe too tough.
White House Christmas Dinner.
We’re holding up the whole cabinet.
Let me lay it out, 'cause this is how I imagine it:
Last year past, yeah, the kids got the toys
But this here, in 2016, I got annoyed
Lives were lost and rights were stomped
Our country voted insanely, we were promised a drained swamp
Now the gators and swamp rats having dinner
And it’s up to us to take it back from the “winners”
So I’m finna bring a ringer to boot. I call him W00t
Down this chim-e-ney chute, he’s our Saint baggin' the loot
Deck the halls with PhonicB∞m and Technickel
Rhyme & W00t up in the booth go electrical
Bright the night cause this Heist gettin’ lit
And it’s only when the last penny’s gone when we quit
'Tis the season with Flowny & Wootmaster
Teddy and Phonic following suit - spell disaster
And we’re naughty till it’s done, then we’re nice
Pullin’ off another Christmas Day Heist
[Woot]
Um...
I was told that there'd be ponies
What's with the politics?
Oh right, it's a heist
I better get to robbing then
I'll sneak in, just like they did in It's About Time
Through about a hundred armed guards, yeah I'll be just fine, see
I got forces, spoilers -- They're horses
Twilight'll teleport us in past their reinforcements
And once we're in I'll shake 'em down from most to least wealthy
Have Rarity run the jewels like Killer Mike and El-P
AJ's dependable, she'll make sure that nobody moves
And if they do, her and Dash'll smash that ass with them hooves
Me and Flutters'll count the cash in a hurry
A billion bucks? Hold on -- Why's my vision all blurry?
Oh, must be that taser. Now the fantasy's fractured
Good thing I gave the dough to Pinkie before I got captured
But I won't make it in jail, I barely survived detention!
Goddammit, see, I knew I shoulda voted for Clinton
[Flowny]
Deck the halls with PhonicB∞m and Tecknickel
Rhyme & W00t up in the booth go electrical
Bright the night cause this Heist gettin’ lit
And it’s only when the last penny’s gone when we quit
'Tis the season with Flowny & Wootmaster
Teddy and Phonic following suit - spell disaster
And we’re naughty till it’s done, then we’re nice
Pullin’ off another Christmas Day Heist
And as Pinkie’s deliverin' all the goods
Poor Woot’s with Secret Service, locked up like Robin Hood
And the money weren’t as much as last year, and that’s clear
The Donald and his cabinet’s still here, and that’s fear
But either way Santa’s funds got improved
And the kids ‘round the world getting toys, honest truth
We thank Woot for his sacrifice -- his last heist
I’m just playin, we got Ted undercover, so act wise
As a Secret Service agent, we made it
So he could get you once you got infiltrated. Anticipating-
This distraction made it easy for me to plant bugs
In the homes of every cabinet member, these damn thugs
Getting tracked and traced for 4 years - a jump start
It’s my tap on Donald’s phone out to Russia’s, my trump card
And with Phonic hitting ‘On’ and recording the Swamp witless
We’ll focus next year on a bigger target for Christmas
Deck the halls with PhonicB∞m and Tecknickel
Rhyme & W00t up in the booth go electrical
Bright the night cause this Heist gettin’ lit
And it’s only when the last penny’s gone when we quit
'Tis the season with Flowny & Wootmaster
Teddy and Phonic following suit - spell disaster
And we’re naughty till it’s done, then we’re nice
Pullin’ off another Christmas Day Heist