Press Conference

Lyrics: Björn Ulvaeus/Benny Andersson/Tim Rice Music: Björn Ulvaeus/Benny Andersson/Tim Rice Announcer Ladies and gentlemen, the chess champion of the world!!! -Reporters Chorus- Why do you persist with vicious attacks Ungracious remarks re: opponents? it smacks of A lack of conviction, admit You’re under duress and that your Only skill left is for money, not chess You say you will win by six games to two But dont you concede he’s a challenger who Is a cut above most of the crap you’ve beaten before So aren’t you pushing your luck by predicting the score. If Soviet life’s as grim as you claim Then how come their boys are so good at the game? Though you swear the American dream- The American way is clearly the best Your image isnt saying a lot For life in the West And though right now you think that you’re hot You’re riding the crest, The day is bound to come when you’re not And so we suggest Respect for just in case you forgot We made you your best The media always gave you a shot So dont be a clown We wouldn’t want to drag you back down (echos) American Ok, what’dya wanna know Reporters Why did you risk the whole match breaking down? American I don’t know what you’re saying, what are you – what are you implying? Reporter All your outrageous demands, self-concede American I don’t see anything outrageous in demanding what i’m worth Reporter They pay you all that you ask for and then you demand even more American Any champion is entitled to as much as he can get, any way he wants to get it. Reporter Does your opponent deserve such abuse? American All Soviets deserve abuse! Reporter But even you must concede he can play American He is the best red on the circuit, sure, I’ll give him that but….. Reporter He hasn’t lost for a long time. he could be a tough nut to crack American Listen, if he gets one game off me, it’s because I wanna keep the press interest going and… Reporters It’s hard to believe what we’re reporting Why so disparaging? Not very sporting American Are the communists sporting, my god!? Reporters Tell all this to the United Nations? Are you an asset to East-West relations? American What is this? what have the Russians done for East-West relations? have you guys got any intelligent questions? Reporter What’s your impression of our little town? American Rather cold and dull, I mean, what did you expect? Reporter Where would you rather have played – Leningrad? American Leningrad was an insulting Soviet suggestion. Reporters They only tried to be friendly – they would have played in New York! American Aww come on – cut the crap. you know as well as I do it was another setup. Reporter How come your second’s a girl, lover-boy? American At least I'm upfront, I say what I think. <pause> What did you say then? Reporter How come your second’s a girl, lover-boy? American I dont know what youre getting at, but dont. Reporters Are you the way chess is going? Are there more like you back at home? American Are all you guys reds? Listen if I do lose…. Reporters You protest too much, We see your ploy-a Big noise to hide your fears Pure paranoia American Im not paranoid, they’re out to get me! Reporters Tell all this to the United Nations? Are you an asset to East-West relations? Chorus Give us a break Whaddya want? Its only a game for goodness sake (Only a game for goodness sake) So give us a break Whaddya want? Its only a game for goodness sake (Only a game for goodness sake) So give us a break Whaddya want? Its only a game for goodness sake (Only a game for goodness sake) So give us a break Whaddya want? (echo) Reporters Well what did I say? He’s out of his tree He’s finally flipped And between you and me He’s no hope of retaining his crown In this frame of mind In fact, he shouldn’t have come here He should have resigned Much better to quit When still number one Than crash to defeat Reputation undone Although he’s proved to himself It’s a communist plot If you ask me It’s money to blame That started the rot It’s sad that the best his country’s produced... Molokov The man is utterly mad.You're playing a lunatic. Russian That's the problem. He's a brilliant lunatic and you can't tell which way he'll jump Like his game he's impossible to analyse You can't dissect him, predict him Which of course means he's not a lunatic at all Molokov What we've just seen's a pathetic display From a man who's beginning to crack...