Lyrics: Francis John Blades
Music: Francis John Blades
There was a strange and awkward child; his parents named him Jacob,
Though Eton, Oxford, Tory Boy - too posh to be a snob,
In Falkirk and The Wrekin, they thought him rather funny,
Campaigning from his Bentley car, accompanied by his nanny.
They all said...
Jacob Rees-Mogg! Who's he?
Jacob Rees-Mogg! Who's he?
He's got a blog, he kissed my dog,
He's Jacob; Jacob Rees-Mogg!
Came down to North East Somerset, campaigned from Frome to Porlock,
The yokels, they all doffed their caps and tugged up their forelocks,
They were all told to vote for him; and they know where they stand,
His dad runs all the newspapers; his wife owns all the land.
And now he's...
Jacob Rees-Mogg! MP
Jacob Rees-Mogg! MP
He's got a blog, he bit my dog,
He's Jacob; Jacob Rees-Mogg!
He's awfully well connected,
And oh, so debonair,
So eloquent; exuberant,
With perfect coiffed hair.
He's happy on the benches,
“Ambition's so obscene”,
But when they move Teresa on,
He's off to see the Queen
And we'll have...
Jacob Rees-Mogg! PM
Jacob Rees-Mogg! PM
That gawky fool, he now rules us all,
He's Jacob; Jacob,
Jacob Rees-Mogg! PM
Jacob Rees-Mogg! PM
The public gets what no-one wants,
Jacob; Jacob, Jacob; Jacob,
He's Jacob Rees-Mogg!