Oh my undercarriage doesn’t feel quiet normal My skin looks just revolting in this foul, fluorescent light And this gown is nothing like the semi-foral,Semi-Spanish gown I should be wearing in the semi-finals tonight I should be dancing the Tarentella Qui mon fella Italiano Not dressed in hospital cotton, with an owchie front bottom, And this miracle. Horrible. Miracle. Smelly little horrible. A miracle miracle I have ever seen I can’t find his frank and beans Every life is Unbelievable unlikely, The chances of existence almost infinitely small The most common thing in life is life and yet every single life, every new life is a miracle miracle miracle My mummy says I'am a miracle, one look at my face,and it’s plain to see Ever since the day doctor chopped the umbilical cord It’s been clear there’s no peer for a miracle like me My mummy says I’m a miracle,that I’m as tiny and as shiny as a mirror ball You can be all cynical,but it’s a truth empirical.There’s never been a miracle,a miracle,a miracle as… My mummy says I’m a lousy little worm.My daddy says I’m a bore. My mummy says I’m a jumped-up little germ that kids like me should be against the law My daddy says I should learn to shut my pie hole.No one likes a smart-mouthed girl like me Mum says I’m a good case for population control. Dad says I should watch more tv