Lyrics: Tim Minchin
Music: Tim Minchin
Look at these trophies
See how my trophies gleam
In the sunlight, see how they shine
What do you think it took to become English Hammer-throwing champion 1959?
Do you think in that moment
When my big moment came
That I treated the rules with casual disdain
Well, Like hell!
As I stepped up to the circle did I change my plan?
Hmm... what?
As I chalked up my palms did I wave my hands?
I DID NOT!
As I started my spin did I look at the view?
Did I drift off and dream for a minute or two?
Do you think I faltered or amended my rotation?
Do you think I altered my intended elevation?
As the hammer took off did I change my grunt
From the grunt I had practiced for many a month?
Not a jot, not a dot did I stray from the plot
Not a detail of my throw was adjusted or forgotten
Not even when the hammer left my hands
And sailed high up, up above the stands
Did I let myself go?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no...
If you want to throw the hammer for your country
You have to stay inside the circle all the time
And if you want to make the team
You dont need happiness or self-esteem
You just need to keep your feet inside the line
Sing, children 2, 3, 4!
If you want to throw the hammer for your country
caténarius est magnitum
You have to stay inside the circle all the time
Magnitum! Magnitum!
And if you want to teach success (Aaah)
You dont use sympathy or tenderness(Tenderness)
You have to force the little squits to toe the line!
Sing, Jenny!
If you want to throw the hammer for your country, (caténarius est magnitum)
You have to stay inside the circle all the time
Circulum est deus, deus!
Gloria
I apply just one simple rule
To hammer-throwing, life, and school
Lifes a ball, so learn to throw it
Find the bally line, and toe it
And always keep your feet inside the line
Now get out!